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-   -   raped by your husband? (http://www.shreveport.com/forums/showthread.php?t=2990)

Morpheus 11-07-2007 04:38 PM

raped by your husband?
 
I'm in my doctor's office and the tv is tuned to Oprah. There are a bunch of woman on here who were "raped" by their husbands. Granted there are some extreme stories here, but O is pushing that having sex with your husband when u don't feel like it is rape. I'm sure that mrs. Morph has done her "wifely duties" on occasion when she wasn't 100 per cent on board so to speak, but i don't think either of us would claim that i raped her. I guess according to Oprah i did. I can't imagine the repercussions of this for the average family with a wife that watches Oprah.

joepole 11-07-2007 04:49 PM

I believe we used to have a state law here that said you couldn't rape your wife, i.e. even if you held her down and forcefully penetrated her it wasn't rape because she was your wife.

joepole 11-07-2007 04:50 PM

Things like "it's rape if you don't feel like it" are part of the reasons the "1 in 4 women will be raped" statistic gets thrown around all the time. Nobody is allowed to question that, either, even though it's obviously untrue.

AnimeSpirit 11-07-2007 04:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Morpheus (Post 24278)
I'm in my doctor's office and the tv is tuned to Oprah. There are a bunch of woman on here who were "raped" by their husbands. Granted there are some extreme stories here, but O is pushing that having sex with your husband when u don't feel like it is rape. I'm sure that mrs. Morph has done her "wifely duties" on occasion when she wasn't 100 per cent on board so to speak, but i don't think either of us would claim that i raped her. I guess according to Oprah i did. I can't imagine the repercussions of this for the average family with a wife that watches Oprah.

I understand that if you have sex with a person who exhibits a measure of resistance, particularly by saying "no," then you have raped that person. They don't have to physically resist. They only have to say "no" or something that amounts to that. I assume marriage is no exception.

Consenting to sex when you don't feel like it is not the same as being forced when you don't want to.

Al Swearengen 11-07-2007 05:55 PM

Then the question of force vs coercion comes into play. But what trips me out is men who claim theyve been raped by women...just seems to me that men who make that claim are sayin they've been betrayed by their own bodies...and even if we accept that as a possibility, theres still the issue of how he was forced to penetrate.

Morpheus 11-07-2007 09:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AnimeSpirit (Post 24282)
Consenting to sex when you don't feel like it is not the same as being forced when you don't want to.

It's not a huge leap to imagine an Oprah watcher, feeling empowered fresh from watching the big O, deciding mid coitus that, hey she doesn't want to be doing this and that she is, in fact, being raped.

Morpheus 11-07-2007 09:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Al Swearengen (Post 24283)
Then the question of force vs coercion comes into play. But what trips me out is men who claim theyve been raped by women...just seems to me that men who make that claim are sayin they've been betrayed by their own bodies...and even if we accept that as a possibility, theres still the issue of how he was forced to penetrate.

I hear you Al! It's just not possible physically. Ask any man whose had a tad to much to drink (not me of course). Only possible scenario where this could be claimed is if you woke up with a double bagger next to you and no recollection of the previous nights events. I can see how you might plead that you had been "date raped".

rhertz 11-07-2007 09:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Morpheus (Post 24288)
It's not a huge leap to imagine an Oprah watcher, feeling empowered fresh from watching the big O, deciding mid coitus that, hey she doesn't want to be doing this and that she is, in fact, being raped.

Just quit watching Oprah and don't go to one of her African schools and you are safe. :D

Morpheus 11-07-2007 09:12 PM

I must add that I'm very fortunate in that I have a wife who's never refused me. I also think that she would never admit that she wasn't always 100% down with the gameplan. I wasn't so fortunate with my first wife. I once went more than 9 months without-my longest dry spell since puberty. I can imagine her claiming that I forced myself upon her with enough Salem witch hysteria in her corner.

Al Swearengen 11-07-2007 11:27 PM

Morph, wish I could say the same about bein "refused". My first wife used sex as leverage to get whatever she wanted (that started after we got married). My second wife had some serious sex issues. Both of them claimed to have been sexually assaulted/molested in their youth, and curiously, both are probably borderline personalities. One thing I noticed from my time on the datin scene followin the second divorce was just how many women I'd met who claimed to have been raped or molested...and I didnt walk, I ran like hell whenever I came across one of those! I was beginnin to think there wasnt a single woman in Shreveport/Bossier who hadnt been victimized at some time in her life, but was bound and determined to find one, and eventually did. So, a word to the wise...if ya want a healthy marriage/relationship, think twice before gettin seriously involved with any woman who tells ya she's been raped or molested, or by God you'll be sorry.

Pocahontas 11-08-2007 07:34 AM

I think that no means no wife or not. It's always best when both parties are in the mood. When one isn't (usually the wife) it's not so good anyway. I'm guessing the women on Oprah (didn't see it) probably felt more emotionally raped by their husbands than the actual physical act.

guitarman 11-08-2007 07:41 AM

The mood :rolleyes: Needs to be a flag at the door to let everybody concerned know what the "MOOD" is. Sometimes my pocketbook gets in a bad mood too ;) No honey no money !



Got to love this one ! Where is Tbelle this song is for you :laugh:

Pocahontas 11-08-2007 07:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Morpheus (Post 24292)
I must add that I'm very fortunate in that I have a wife who's never refused me.

You must be a newlywed then!:laugh:

Isaac-Saxxon 11-08-2007 03:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Morpheus (Post 24327)
Yes Pokie I am! Three years this October. I have heard that you're a newlywed until you hit double digits. However, with my first wife the honeymoon was over in a matter of months if not weeks. I thought it was normal, since you always hear jokes about it. i.e. Scientists have discovered a food that decreases a female's sex drive by 90%. It's called "wedding cake". I'm glad to find out that it doesn't HAVE to be true.

It never gets any better than a woman that wants to have a baby :D If you could bottle that energy you would be a very happy man :laugh:

Morpheus 11-08-2007 03:57 PM

Yes Pokie I am! Three years this October. I have heard that you're a newlywed until you hit double digits. However, with my first wife the honeymoon was over in a matter of months if not weeks. I thought it was normal, since you always hear jokes about it. i.e. Scientists have discovered a food that decreases a female's sex drive by 90%. It's called "wedding cake". I'm glad to find out that it doesn't HAVE to be true.


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