Raoul Knows Everybody!
Raoul was bragging to his boss one day, "You know, I know everyone there is to know. Just name someone, anyone, and I'll bet you I know them."
Tired of his boasting, his boss called his bluff. "Okay, Raoul... how about Tom Cruise?"
"Sure, yes, Tom and I are old friends, and I can prove it."
So Raoul and his boss fly out to Hollywood and knock on Tom Cruise's door, and sure enough, Cruise answers the door, shouts, "Raoul! Great to see you! You and your friend come right in and join me for lunch!"
Although impressed, Raoul's boss is still skeptical. After they leave Cruise's house, he tells Raoul that he thinks Raoul's knowing Cruise was just lucky.
"No, no, just name anyone else," Raoul says.
"President Bush," his boss quickly retorts.
"Yeah," Raoul says, "I know him. Let's fly to Washington and I'll prove it." And off they go.
At the White House, Bush spots Raoul on the tour and motions him and his boss over, saying, "Raoul, what a nice surprise! I was just on my way to a meeting, but you and your friend come on in. Let's have a cup of coffee first, and catch up."
Well, the boss is very shaken by now, but still not totally convinced.
After they leave the White House grounds, he expresses his doubts to Raoul, who again implores him to name anyone else. "The Pope," his boss replies.
"Sure!" says Raoul. "I've known the Pope a long time."
So they next fly to Rome.
Raoul and his boss are assembled with the masses in Vatican Square when Raoul says, "This will never work. I can't catch the Pope's eye down here in all these people. Tell you what, I know all the guards so let me just go upstairs and I'll come out on the balcony with the Pope."
And he disappears into the crowd headed toward the Vatican. Sure enough, half an hour later Raoul emerges with the Pope on the balcony.
But by the time Raoul returns, he finds that his boss has had a heart attack and is surrounded by paramedics. Working his way to his boss's side, Raoul asks him, "Boss! What happened?"
His boss looks up and says, "I was doing fine until you and the Pope came out on the balcony and then the Japanese tourist next to me asked, 'Who's that on the balcony with Raoul?'"
