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Old 04-03-2007, 12:09 PM   #1
scarlett
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Talking Ever Wonder........................

EVER WONDER ~~~~

Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin

Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?

Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?

Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?

Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?

Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on "Start"?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid is
made with real lemons?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why
don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?


In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through
stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.

On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping.

On a bag of Fritos: ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary.
Details inside. (the shoplifter special?)


On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that
would be how??...)

On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's
"just" a suggestion.)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down
(well...duh, a bit late, huh!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating."
(...and you thought????..)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but
wouldn't this save me more time?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine:"Do not drive a car or operate machinery
after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of
construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with
head-colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and... I'm taking
this because???....)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only."
(as opposed to...what?)

On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use."(now,
somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)

On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat
nuts."
(Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)

On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable
you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this
one.)

On a Swedish chainsaw:"Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals." (..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
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Old 04-03-2007, 01:25 PM   #2
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Quote:
Originally Posted by scarlett
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
I can tell you exactly why this is. For one, if I won the lottery by psychically predicting its outcome, I would NOT TELL ANYONE!!! You would never have a moment's peace for the rest of your life for all the people knocking on your door for the winning numbers.

Also, if a psychic began distributing the winning numbers, what would be the point? Every person would have to split the winnings. That's another reason to keep it to yourself.

And finally, psychic ability works on a basis of sensing and interpretting subtle energy impressions. These impressions come from anything that emits any kind of subtle life force (people or things recently touched by people). The machine that draws the winning numbers does not emit such impressions. The only impressions it can emit are about the people who recently touched the machine and not of the machine itself.

The only way to predict a machine's outcome is by obtaining your impressions from the other side (whatever you wish to call it), where the laws of time do not apply. This is a very rare and indirect means of psychic prediction (guardian angel type stuff).

In short, these reason are why you never see such headlines. Funny stuff, by the way!
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Old 04-03-2007, 01:42 PM   #3
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Also consider the fact that 100% of psychics are either pretending or crazy since there is no such things as psychic powers.
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Old 04-03-2007, 01:52 PM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by joepole
Also consider the fact that 100% of psychics are either pretending or crazy since there is no such things as psychic powers.
You could consider that, but it would be very presumptuous to say.
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Old 04-03-2007, 03:36 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by joepole
Also consider the fact that 100% of psychics are either pretending or crazy since there is no such things as psychic powers.
ESP has been well studied and documented since the 60's. The feds (US and Russians) have been spending our tax money on psychic warfare for decades. Even murder detectives, who are very "down to earth" kind of people, admit to some psychics helping them solve dead-ended murder cases.

Haven't you ever witnessed a psychic event for yourself Joe? Read your wifes mind? I think that nearly everyone has some degree of psychic ability but never develop it for one reason or another.

In fact, I'm reading your mind right now Joepole! You are thinking........."Bullsh!t"! See? It works!!
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Old 04-03-2007, 04:13 PM   #6
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There has never in the course of human history been a single properly conducted, scientifically proper, peer-reviewed study that confirmed the existence of extra sensory perception.
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Old 04-03-2007, 04:31 PM   #7
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No one saw the apple hit Sir Isaac Newton on the head, but no one is doubting gravity.
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Old 04-04-2007, 12:34 PM   #8
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On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's
"just" a suggestion.)

That reminds me of Tom Cruise in Risky Business sucking on that frozen tv dinner popcicle.
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Old 04-04-2007, 02:10 PM   #9
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Newtonian gravity is a scientifically demonstrable principle. ESP is fiction.
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Old 04-04-2007, 03:12 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by joepole
Also consider the fact that 100% of psychics are either pretending or crazy since there is no such things as psychic powers.
How do you know?
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Last edited by FACT; 04-24-2011 at 01:02 AM.
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Old 04-04-2007, 03:14 PM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by joepole
There has never in the course of human history been a single properly conducted, scientifically proper, peer-reviewed study that confirmed the existence of extra sensory perception.
Prove it.
________
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Last edited by FACT; 04-24-2011 at 01:02 AM.
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Old 04-04-2007, 03:15 PM   #12
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For the same reason I know magic and wizardry and other made-up things are made-up.
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Old 04-04-2007, 03:15 PM   #13
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How exactly does one prove a negative in this context?
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Old 04-04-2007, 04:04 PM   #14
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Now I know Joe has a Ouija board under his bed

JoePOLE you do have a Ouija board or you have used one before ? No paranormal events in your life ? No déjà vu Joe ?? No déjà vu Joe ??
Isaac
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Old 04-04-2007, 04:05 PM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by joepole
For the same reason I know magic and wizardry and other made-up things are made-up.
Do you consider animal "instinct" to be real or made up? If it is real, then please explain the mechanics of exactly how it works? How does an animal tell time without a watch, for instance. Some animals have amazing talents that we call instincts that cannot be explained anymore than ESP can. That doesn't mean that they don't exist.
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