Family Fuming Over Student's Unflattering Awards

[joepole]

I still don't get the "have children" one so I can't comment on its cruelty, but a "Sir Clowns a lot award" isn't exactly "humiliating."

[Texasbelle]

When my 18 y/o son was in sixth grade at Evangel and it was time for their graduation, we (the parents who organized graduation) let the students in the classes vote on several "awards" for the students. There was one award per student. The awards were things like "Most Likely to Suceed", "Most Likely to be a Doctor, "Most likely to marry a Hollywood Star", "Most likely to be a rocket scientist" and etc. You get the idea. The awards were all on the positive side and none of them poked fun at anyone. Each student received an award at graduation and they were so excited to see which one they won. It was a positive experience for all even the boys and girls who were trouble makers all year long.

My whole point is there is a time and place for everything and some things have no place. Humiliating the point or even giving the merest hint of humiliation was unnecessary. If the boy was a behavior issue, he should have been dealt with at the appropriate time and not like this. None of us would like our children being treated that way and you know it.

[piemaker720]

Originally Posted by Texasbelle

When my 18 y/o son was in sixth grade at Evangel and it was time for their graduation, we (the parents who organized graduation) let the students in the classes vote on several "awards" for the students. There was one award per student. The awards were things like "Most Likely to Suceed", "Most Likely to be a Doctor, "Most likely to marry a Hollywood Star", "Most likely to be a rocket scientist" and etc. You get the idea. The awards were all on the positive side and none of them poked fun at anyone. Each student received an award at graduation and they were so excited to see which one they won. It was a positive experience for all even the boys and girls who were trouble makers all year long.

My whole point is there is a time and place for everything and some things have no place. Humiliating the point or even giving the merest hint of humiliation was unnecessary. If the boy was a behavior issue, he should have been dealt with at the appropriate time and not like this. None of us would like our children being treated that way and you know it.

Belle, please clarify this: your 18 y/o in the sixth grade. That does not sound right. Never mind I think I got it now. Too much sun today, brain not working right yet.

[piemaker720]

Originally Posted by joepole

I still don't get the "have children" one so I can't comment on its cruelty, but a "Sir Clowns a lot award" isn't exactly "humiliating."

There is no excuse for the comment least likely to have children, kids their age aren't studying becoming parents. As for as the clowning part they could have said it in a manner that showed they were joking with him not cutting him down which seems to be the way he took it. Also the teachers were told to apolgize for hurting his feelings and they won't, so that tells me they were not playing with him.

[LateNight]

Originally Posted by piemaker720

As for as the clowning part they could have said it in a manner that showed they were joking with him not cutting him down which seems to be the way he took it. Also the teachers were told to apolgize for hurting his feelings and they won't, so that tells me they were not playing with him.

who knows "how they said it" I suspect the whole thing was meant as a joke.. I wonder if any other kids got any "awards" as well ?
I swear, I don't see the big deal. Heck, the kid might even had thought it was funny "at the time" joking around.. then momma finds out about it and has the freakin' fit.. ?? who knows ?

Both my boys have a very good sense of humor.. I guarantee something like this wouldn't find them coming home complaining about it.. but joking about it.

I will say, this is all dependent on the "Delivery/context" etc.. which we all know nothing about.

[piemaker720]

Originally Posted by LateNight

who knows "how they said it" I suspect the whole thing was meant as a joke.. I wonder if any other kids got any "awards" as well ?
I swear, I don't see the big deal. Heck, the kid might even had thought it was funny "at the time" joking around.. then momma finds out about it and has the freakin' fit.. ?? who knows ?

Both my boys have a very good sense of humor.. I guarantee something like this wouldn't find them coming home complaining about it.. but joking about it.

I will say, this is all dependent on the "Delivery/context" etc.. which we all know nothing about.

I know from experience that there are times in school that a child's feeling get hurt by teachers and other kids and the child never told anyone. Then they wonder why kids do school shooting. They hold that angue inside, but if the complain then you say they are a wuss. That the parents [excuse me moms] are making to much of this. Your boys might have a good sense of humor but I bet their feelings can still be hurt.

[LateNight]

Now school shootings are my fault ?

Look.. I don't feel like discussing this much more, without any of us knowing the context of all this. If the kid was shy, or already had issues etc.. then I could see this being a problem.. But i've been coming at this, as "what if" this kid WAS the class clown.. and IF that WAS the case.. then he should be able to take a joke, or quit cuttin' up in class, and wasting everyone else's time. That's all I'm saying.

But we don't know if he was the class clown etc.. it happens all the time.. student screams "Teacher called me a horses' ass!" turns out he was acting like an ass.

I'm talking particulars.. and we don't have any yet in this story.

[piemaker720]

Originally Posted by LateNight

Now school shootings are my fault ?

Look.. I don't feel like discussing this much more, without any of us knowing the context of all this. If the kid was shy, or already had issues etc.. then I could see this being a problem.. But i've been coming at this, as "what if" this kid WAS the class clown.. and IF that WAS the case.. then he should be able to take a joke, or quit cuttin' up in class, and wasting everyone else's time. That's all I'm saying.

But we don't know if he was the class clown etc.. it happens all the time.. student screams "Teacher called me a horses' ass!" turns out he was acting like an ass.

I'm talking particulars.. and we don't have any yet in this story.

No LN school shootings are not your, nobody said they were. The only thing I said alot of them happen because the kids have underlying anger. I also agree there may be two sides of this story. But if the teachers don't tell their side then uhmm!

[BrainSmashR]

Originally Posted by LateNight

Now school shootings are my fault ?

Look.. I don't feel like discussing this much more, without any of us knowing the context of all this. If the kid was shy, or already had issues etc.. then I could see this being a problem.. But i've been coming at this, as "what if" this kid WAS the class clown.. and IF that WAS the case.. then he should be able to take a joke, or quit cuttin' up in class, and wasting everyone else's time. That's all I'm saying.

But we don't know if he was the class clown etc.. it happens all the time.. student screams "Teacher called me a horses' ass!" turns out he was acting like an ass.

I'm talking particulars.. and we don't have any yet in this story.

Very good point.

However a child being an ass DOES NOT give the teacher the right to call him an ass in front of the entire classroom....and in that particular example, the use of profanity by a teacher in front of the student would indeed warrant some type of reprimand.

You punish children for bad behavior, you reward them for good behavior, under no circumstance should you intentionally humiliate them.

[joepole]

>And saying you'll never have children isn't "exactly" calling someone ugly or impotent either...

I know. Maybe he got kicked in the nuts. Maybe he said he was never going to have children. Maybe his class did the flour bag baby thing and he left his out in the rain. There are plenty of ways this could be the most non-offensive thing in the world. Without knowing anything else about this I can't say whether or not it's an over-reaction.

I'm pretty sure this is an over-reaction to a "class clown" award.

[LateNight]

Originally Posted by BrainSmashR

Very good point.

However a child being an ass DOES NOT give the teacher the right to call him an ass in front of the entire classroom....and in that particular example, the use of profanity by a teacher in front of the student would indeed warrant some type of reprimand.

In this day of political correctness and all that entails, no it's not a good idea.. But I've also know PLENTY of brilliant/excellent teachers.. who aren't afraid to do just that.. and when some kid is wasting MY time and everyone else's by acting an ass.. I appreciate a teacher who is willing to call them on it.. PC be damned..

Just as when you got some kid walking around school with his pants hangin' around his knees.. I appreciate the teacher who will call them on that too.. public humiliation being a good starting point.

So we'll just have to disagree on that one.

[BrainSmashR]

Originally Posted by LateNight

who knows "how they said it" I suspect the whole thing was meant as a joke.. I wonder if any other kids got any "awards" as well ?
I swear, I don't see the big deal. Heck, the kid might even had thought it was funny "at the time" joking around.. then momma finds out about it and has the freakin' fit.. ?? who knows ?

Obvious you didn't read the story, because those of us who did KNOW how the kid felt from his own testimony:

"I was standing in the middle of (the two teachers), and they (were) reading them off," he said. "Everyone was laughing."

Matt felt humiliated.

"They (were) putting us down and everything," he said. "That is not what their job is for, to put kids down. They are supposed to teach us."

Does it still sound like he thought it was funny?

Both my boys have a very good sense of humor.. I guarantee something like this wouldn't find them coming home complaining about it.. but joking about it.

Yeah, I bet you thought it was funny and your Dad would have too. I suspect that's a learned trait because it's not one exhibited by my family, by anyone I know, and by anyone participating in this conversation other than you and Joe....and we already know he neglects his children.

I will say, this is all dependent on the "Delivery/context" etc.. which we all know nothing about.

Again, I disagree, there's no "nice" way to say you either lack the ability to reproduce or you are so unattractive that no woman would want to sleep with you.

[BrainSmashR]

Originally Posted by joepole

I still don't get the "have children" one so I can't comment on its cruelty, but a "Sir Clowns a lot award" isn't exactly "humiliating."

And saying you'll never have children isn't "exactly" calling someone ugly or impotent either...